Big girl now?

Where did the time go? I can hardly believe that Sage will be turning 1 on Monday.

I took the day off so that I could have a special Mommy-Sagey-Daddy day with her. It makes me wistful to know that I’ve been back at work full time for the past 7 months, to know that she changes every single day, to know that every morning when I leave she whines and cries for me a little before she moves on to playing with Matt.

These months of working and mothering have been hard, every day is a matter of finding the balance point between good employee and good mother. If she’s sick, do I stay home because she takes ultimate comfort from me? Or do I let Matt handle it so that I can work? Do I push a data heavy project to the next week and come home early? Or do I spend those precious couple of hours with Sage…

For the most part, I think that I have achieved a good balance. Some days I feel like a bad employee, I worry about coworkers thinking that I’m a slacker. Other days I feel like Super Mom, my to do list is full of check marks and I’m home at 4:30 to play and run around with Sage, my cape flapping behind me.

The house is also showing evidence of the balance. Sage can toddle around now while I tidy up. Pieces of life have fallen into place, whereas when I first went back to work my life was in constant upheaval. Lack of sleep, lack of attention, lack of me time, lack of Matt time.

And toddle she does. It’s amazing to see the constant decision making and balance correcting manifest in her facial expression and jerky maneuvers. Her brows furrowed and lip jutted out, she explores the world with outstretched hands and wide, bright eyes.

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I was surprised that she began walking before she turned 1, Matt and I can’t help but think she is a little genius. It’s hard not to since she is absorbing information and details about the world around her with every glance. Absorption turns into smiles, babbling almost words, waving bye-bye, clapping when she hears “Yay!” or “Good job!,” and squealing when she hears the dog’s name.

I can’t even grasp what the next year or even couple of months will bring (ok maybe I do, I think she has already started some tantruming), I will just dwell on how lucky Matt and I are to have this squealing, squishy, giggling, beautiful little girl in our lives.

I love you, Sage.

Love,
Your Mommy

the perfect storm…

Teething.  A cataclysmic event that turned my angelic, chubby princess into a little terror.  Don’t get me wrong, I feel for her and it pains me to see her so upset, but it’s hard to grasp that I’m going to fondly  look back on these times while I am now deep in the throes of sleep deprivation.

Teething = waking up every 1-2 hours at night, only to be comforted by nursing; bipolar tendencies; excessive drool (pretty cute); gnawing on anything and everything; inconsolable crying; constant moaning.  I didn’t know babies could moan in pain.  It is heartbreaking.  And that damn tooth still doesn’t want to pop through.

Coupled with the fact that I return to work on Wednesday, these past weeks have turned out to be very tiring.  Four-month-old babies are absolutely delightful… Sage smiles, giggles, squeals and can hardly contain her excitement sometimes.  But, as many parents probably know, everything is a phase and the angelic periods are peppered with meltdowns due to teething, sleep regression, growth spurts and tons of other milestones that can cause a baby to vacillate between happy and crabby all day (and night) long.

I’m crossing my fingers that this teething episode will last only a couple days (it’s day 4 by the way).  A Google search unearthed many stories from mothers who dealt with these symptoms for months.  :|

On a lighter note, Sage started eating solid foods the other day.  We’ve been experimenting every once in awhile since we believe that the baby should determine when they are ready to eat solid foods.  I think that waiting until 6 months seems arbitrary, but AAP recommends it in order to prevent food allergies since most babies have matured digestive systems by 6 months.  So, we had success these past couple of days with peas of all things!  If you haven’t opened up and examined the color and consistency of baby food peas, I don’t recommend it.  Pretty nasty.  But little Sage loved it!  Surprising, since she balked at sweet potatoes a couple weeks ago.

I hope this means she’s going to get even chubbier…! :)

Okay, enough blogging, my eyes are about to fall out of my head and roll around on the desk.  I’m going to bed early tonight!

Sage needs her own closet…

I think that we are set for Sage’s clothes during the first year.  We have so many cute outfits for 6mo, 9mo, and 12mo.  She’s getting so big! She can already fit into 6mo clothes, and she’s not swimming in fabric.  Sage is our little chunky monkey ;)  But anyway, her drawers are full of clothing and it’s getting so hard to organize the sizes!  She needs her own rack in our huge walk-in closet.

Lately Sage has been falling asleep in her carseat, but she’s having a bad day today.  She’s either crying or napping today; we are pretty sure she is teething.  All of a sudden her tooth is going to pop out! :) Hopefully she feels better tomorrow, then we can go and have a family outing in Scottsdale (and hit up Sprinkles…!)

no cry napping

Matt and I decided to purchase a book from the “no cry” series entitled The No-Cry Nap Solution.  Elizabeth Pantley is also the author of The No-Cry Sleep Solution, but it’s so easy to get Sage to sleep for the night so we don’t need that book (yet…might have jinxed it).  We strongly disagree with the “cry it out” method of parenting as there have been some recent studies linking this method and all of its consequences to permanent brain damage.  Babies need their parents, period, and allowing a baby to cry until they realize that no one is coming to comfort them is truly heartbreaking.  We want Sage to be able to trust us to fulfill her needs, but I’m not going to lie and say that it isn’t tiring.  So we are approaching nap time from this perspective and believe that being gentle in our methods, whether that means rocking her for hours every day, will pay off.

It’s funny how many crutches we need to ensure that Sage falls asleep and stays asleep.  I worry that it’ll be too exhausting for Matt to bounce, shush, rock, swing and swaddle Sage day after day while I’m at work.  I don’t care what anyone says about him being a stay at home dad, parenting is a tough but extremely rewarding job!

We definitely don’t expect Sage to announce when she is tired, happily lay in her crib and drift off to sleep all by herself, but it would be nice to cut down on this “ritual” and not rely on her swing every day.  It requires D batteries, and those aren’t cheap! Fortunately, Matt has hacked the swing and uses rechargeable AA batteries within a D battery “housing” from eneloop, so that is one less issue.  He’s so resourceful :)

When you become a parent you don’t anticipate how obsessed you’ll become with napping, pooping and playtime. Did she nap long enough? Frequently enough? Does she get restorative sleep from napping in the swing?  Why is her poop green today?! Did she get enough learning time? Is she going to learn to talk if I just babble all the time?  And on and on and on.  Add all of these questions to my already neurotic personality and you have an excessive amount of worry. I’ll admit that sometimes I do need to take a chill pill and back off from being “type A” when it comes to parenting.

So, we’ll see how this goes.  Sorry, no cute pictures of Sage today… too lazy to upload from my SD card. Maybe next time :)

mommy and daddy are boooring.

Yesterday Sage gave us (Matt) a rough day and decided that she didn’t want to take any daytime naps.  She fought me every time I tried to put her down for a nap, meaning that poor Matt would have to take over and use his magic Daddy dance to get her to fall asleep.  It works every time, but it takes like 10 minutes and Sage isn’t exactly light as a feather anymore… :) After a week of being a happy baby who is totally cool with naptime, Sage did another 180°… but it’s to be expected.  She changes every day and it’s an even more dramatic change from week to week.

We decided that when Sage gets to go out, hang around in her sling and interact with the world around her, she is a much happier baby and more amenable to naptime.  I mean, if the most exciting thing in the world was happening ALL THE TIME around me I would probably not want to nap through it either.  Also, by now our house is probably getting pretty old to her.  So we decided to make a trek to the mall and walk around aimlessly since it’s way too hot for Sage to be outdoors during the day.  After maybe 20 minutes of walking through stores (yes, including the Disney store and yes we bought her some stuffed animals…), Sage decided she had her fill of random people walking up to tell her how darn cute she is and fell fast asleep in her sling.

It’s strange because having her in her sling makes me feel like I’m pregnant again, I’ve even got a bit of a waddle when I’m walking around with her because her weight (13 lbs!!!!) will swing from side to side slightly.  I was relieved that my pregnancy was over because I was getting so uncomfortable towards the end, but now I love having her so close to me again.

Our free trial from The Honest Company arrived last week, and I was really excited to try out all of the samples.  It included 6 diapers, a pack of biodegradable wipes, organic diaper rash cream, laundry detergent, body lotion, body wash and hand soap (all made without harsh chemicals).

I’m loving all of the little samples, but we were disappointed with the diapers and wipes.  Unfortunately Sage had a couple diaper blowouts (not fun to clean up) while trying out the Honest diapers so I think they don’t fit her or aren’t sized very well.  The wipes are very thick and made with gentle cleaning ingredients – which is awesome – but they felt sort of rough compared to her normal Lansinoh baby wipes.  Oh well, it was a free trial and the samples will last for awhile.  We’re just going to stick with Pampers Swaddlers while we’re out n’ about because we like the little strip that turns blue when her diaper is wet.

until next time! :)

double date night

Last night Matt and I were able to go on a double date with my brother Cory and his girlfriend Lindsey.  They also just had a baby so it was nice to get out and have dinner together without needing to nurse and soothe babies.  A baby’s realization of when it is dinner time is pretty accurate.  Sage and my nephew Evan always seem to get hungry when we are just sitting down to eat… Coincidence? I think not.

All in all it sounds like Sage had a good night and we had a good date night.  Lindsey’s parents volunteered to watch both babies (both, at the same time?!) and reported that Sage had a crying jag but was calm for the rest of the night.  We returned to find Sage serenely taking a bottle from Lindsey’s dad, and her mom gently soothing Evan in a rocking chair.  They had kicked the dogs outside for being rowdy (yes, Artoo was getting dog-sat too!) and the house was completely quiet.  Quite the opposite of a warzone, which is what we expected to return to.  I suppose that Matt and I exaggerate how upset Sage gets, it still sounds like I was a more difficult baby (or so my parents say).

I’m glad that we were able to go out, but Sage is always on my mind and I feel more at ease when I am around her.  When we left the house to go to dinner, it felt like we were missing something.  It was strange to not have Sage along with us.  I guess this is the kind of bond that forms when you have been completely immersed with another little human for 3 months! :)

 

It has been getting easier and easier to comfort Sage to sleep, as she often gets upset after she’s a little tired.  We usually need to bounce, rock, shh, cradle, and swing her after she wails for a couple of minutes.  However, the wailing seems to be subsiding as if she realizes what we’re trying to do and is used to the “ritual of napping.”   She’s now 12.5 weeks old and already starting to become a less fussy baby as she becomes more interested in the world around her. I’m excited to witness her next milestones, can’t wait until she laughs for the first time!

okay, enough blogging, it’s playtime again!

 

happy baby, happy mommy (& happy artoo!)

Today was a great day with Sage, Matt, and Artoo.

I’m beginning to miss running errands with Matt, as boring as that sounds.  I’ve always thought it was nice to drive around, do our thing, chit-chat, shop for groceries, and wander around the mall.  It is usually a struggle for both of us to go out and run errands together because Sage can get fussy and bored in her car seat (already showing her personality!!)  So one of us will stay home to watch the baby while the other runs around town (usually me at home, Matt out and about).

We are lucky if Sage takes a nap in the car on the way to our destination, then naps for a bit in the stroller.  But she usually wakes up during the transition from car to stroller.

We had coupons for Babies R Us, and I love looking at baby things.  I buy way too many things for Sage.  It’s more fun to shop for her than for myself nowadays.  So we made our way to Babies R Us, and I hurriedly picked out things to buy (some clothes and a learning toy if you’re wondering) before Sage would start to cry in her stroller.  But what I had been dreading never happened!  Sage cooed, smiled, and wiggled the entire time that Matt and I shopped around.  She was completely fascinated by the store, everything was new and exciting to her.  I don’t think we’ve ever seen her so happy in her stroller.

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We decided to test our luck and took Artoo to the dog park since she is… getting chubby.  I walked Sage around in her sling, enjoying the slightly humid summer evening.  There was some lightning in the distance, and Sage was mesmerized by the bright lights that lit up the park.  We strolled around and let Artoo play with other dogs for about half an hour without a peep out of Sage.  She was quietly content and alert, taking everything in and watching the dogs run around.  It was amazing, once again reaffirming that we LOVE our sling.  It is an awesome baby item.  I’m glad that Artoo was able to socialize and get some exercise.

After returning home, I nursed Sage to sleep and she had a nice full tummy.  I think that she’s had a great day :)

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I’ve decided that I’m going to try out Jessica Alba’s brand of diapers since we use disposable diapers when traveling with Sage.  She wears bumGenius 3.0 cloth diapers at home, but since they are bulky it is easiest to use Pampers in the diaper bag for when we are out.  The Honest brand of diapers and wipes is biodegradable, and as chemical free as diapers can get.  That makes me feel a bit better about what Sage is exposed to. You can find her brand at The Honest Co, Matt just ordered the free trial.  I’m excited, the diapers are super cute! :)

until next time!

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